[Libre-soc-dev] RfPs 2021-02-052: The Libre-SOC Gigabit Router declined

[Luke Kenneth Casson Leighton]

so i have not been able to do anything today, despite being
imposed abusive deadlines with changing and increasing amounts
of work, blackmailing me to do work instead of focussing on
health recovery.

i slept extremely badly due to the shock of yesterday, woke
up around 8am to receive another shocking message, which
was so distressing that i could not stop crying, and went
back to sleep to recover, waking again around 11am i think,
trying to get through to my doctor that i had massively
high blood pressure again.

i then got *even more* shocking messages, and ended up sleeping
until 4pm to recover. i woke to again *another* shock on finding
the declined RFPs, despite many of them having had joint
payees been paid, which was so distressing it caused breathing
difficulties and i had to call emergency services.

the paramedics were professional but just as fed up as i am,
and i had to walk out of the ambulance, crying. i don't know
how long i slept (again) or what happened but i remember waking
up again at 8:15pm.

i've done a few things i enjoy, today, which are an important
part of physical health recovery - keeping endorphin levels
high is absolutely absolutely essential. oxyciton (something)
dopamine they all need to be triggered by doing specific types
of things, such as feeding animals, giving people a compliment,
i am following this almost "by rote", from my research into
the subject, and it is working.

i have been feeding crows on the beach, i forgot to do that
today and just about managed to fit it in around 8:20pm just
before sunset. i did some singing practice this evening
in the woods, which i love. walked to the shops, got some more
bird food for tomorrow.

i am not *in any way* - without help - ready to write reports,
deal with abusive sudden demands on an impending deadline,
the demands just put me into deep shock and trauma.

l.





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geometry: without it life is pointless
the fibonacci series: easy as 1 1 2 3